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  • In Universe Dateline: September 30th 2024
  • S4 server team member slips on carpal tunnel braces with the calm of a soldier prepared to die in battle
  • SUG Rebels gain legitimacy in Venezuela following several successful offensives
  • Skirmishes along Afghanistan-Pakistan border raises concerns about new flare up in the region
  • Malden defense forces intercept massive shipment of weapons and narcotics from Libya
  • Florida dad spends retirement untangling big mess of wires
  • Livonian parliament passes reunification law, US and Polish troops plan staged withdrawal
  • Man claims he was acting under Taylor Swift's secret orders after being arrested at NATO summit
  • THESE HEADLINES ARE WORKS OF FICTION INTENDED TO SUPPORT THE STORYLINES OF THE 3d MRB REALISM UNIT

Maj (Ret) Ray

Retired
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Everything posted by Maj (Ret) Ray

  1. This was fun. If you didn't attend, you missed out.
  2. 107.221.50.10:2302 pw 3dmarsoc The 8310 server is now running this custom mod pack, if you care to test out ahead of time.
  3. He was probably surrounded by blondes. What a way to go.
  4. HM2 (FMF) Williams: "Hey, who's Jon Gruden?" GySgt Cole: "He's a former coach." SSgt Specter: "Yeah, he used to coach Tampa Bay and the Raiders." HM2 (FMF) Williams: "Is he black?" GySgt Cole: "What? No, why?" HM2 (FMF) Williams: "He's listed as the color commentator…" SSgt Specter, dying laughing: "J Willy, you retard!"
  5. Capt Ray: "I'm back. Where did everyone go?" CW3 "Otto" Whelan: "S-5 meeting." Capt Ray: "Oh. Wait, where are Grimm and Boardman?" HM2 (FMF) Williams: "They left for the night." Capt Ray: "Ah. Sunday Night Sex at the Boardgrimm household." HM2 (FMF) Williams: "I wish that was my household tonight." CW3 "Otto" Whelan: "I wouldn't mind having sex with Grimm either."
  6. GySgt Cole: "Wait, Parker said something? What did I miss?" SSgt Specter: "We were talking about the first person to use tampons, and Parker asked, 'What, in their ass?'"
  7. Capt Ray: "Heyyyyyy I had water pressure and took a shower for the first time in 3 days!" Sgt Cole: "Nice" Sgt Cole: "I've had water pressure this whole time and I think I hadn't showered in 3 days!"
  8. Three days and counting without reliable internet…
  9. No home internet, no TV, no water pressure, a boil water notice, and I still have to go to work tomorrow. Yeah, fuck this hurricane.
  10. When you text your team SARC during a hurricane.
  11. * Contains sponsored content probably
  12. When you think of mod pack updates as "new kit."
  13. It's OK. I'm dead on the inside, soon I'll be dead on the outside too. help me
  14. Publix is more than a grocery store, it's a haven. There's nothing like it in the US.
  15. The S-4 Command Center is active. I see you all.
  16. Meanwhile, on global... <16:31:22> "Capt Wolfe": Koch is drunk my channel <16:31:27> "1stLt Koch": fuck unjk
  17. Don't do this to me.
  18. Your Command Staff at work: Capt Ray: "I'm back, I apologize for the delay. Oh, Makowski has his BRB up, I should have taken my time." Capt Wolfe: "He's taking a shit." 1stLt Hart: "That's a long bloody shit." Capt Ray: "That sounds pretty bad." 1stLt Hart, realizing what he actually just said: "Oh, *lol* I didn't mean it like that!" Capt Wolfe: "Ohhhhhhhh, that's disgusting. I've smelled that before. I'd rather smell a dead body!"
  19. I'm the technical lead for desktop IT support at a hospital. I basically do everything, including things that are not in my job description, such as: kick off and implement projects, provide direct support to local and visiting VIPs, routine support ticket work, assist the network/server administrator to identify the purpose and functionality of servers (yes...), maintain the site inventory, perform annual software and hardware audits, complete annual risk assessments, etc etc. I should really have a managerial title and pay, but because individual sites don't get departmental IT managers, I get screwed. I'm actively looking for a new job, preferably managerial. Departmental manager, project manager, that kind of thing. You guys posting above or below this who are excited to get into IT, beware. Find a really good workplace or prepare to hate your life.
  20. Capt Wolfe: "Oh my God, look at that fucking ass! It's like a Jabberwocky!"
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