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NEWS
  • In Universe Dateline: Febuary 14th 2023
  • Tensions rise in South Africa after no clear winner in Presidential election
  • Bomb in Tehran café kills three IRGC members, separatists suspected
  • Dominican Republic government on verge of collapse as gang violence escalates in Santa Domingo
  • Russia claims successful test of nuclear-powered cruise missile, experts remain skeptical
  • Man claims he was acting under Taylor Swift's secret orders after being arrested at NATO summit
  • Livonia detains 12 over suspected coup attempt
  • Sahrani troops disperse protest with gunfire, 8 reported dead
  • Hurricane rips through Florida Cemetery; Hundreds reported Dead
  • THESE HEADLINES ARE WORKS OF FICTION INTENDED TO SUPPORT THE STORYLINES OF THE 3d MRB REALISM UNIT
Capt (Ret) Dale

3d MRB Quote Book

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HM3 Peterson: "Rivera, could you look at my PP?"

Edited by LCpl Lee
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47 minutes ago, LCpl Lee said:

HM3 Peterson: "Rivera, could you look at my PP?"

He left out the good part


HM2 (FMF) Rivera: I hope your talking about your promotion points and not your pee pee. 
 

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Group of us on squad 

 

SSgt Schwarz while I’m dead: “Stay down Melbert!”

Me: I don’t have a fucking choice Duck!!

Edited by Sgt Melbert
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Me: I'm a pacifist sometimes 

 

@LtCol MakowskiMakowski : Specter you literally have a cult of people who flock to you on Friday nights to laugh about people being killed.

 

Me: Yeah that's fair.

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3 hours ago, HM2 (FMF) Rivera said:

GySgt Specter: "When I feel it in my eyes, that's how I know I'm drunk enough."

I vaguely remember this.

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MSgt Carter: Don't talk about that to me Rivera, you SARCs complain about everything: If there's too little going on, if there's too much going on, always something with y'all.

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<18:42:09> "Sgt Melbert": Sgt Melbert - Resignation

I, Sgt Melbert, hereby submit my resignation to the 3d MRB Realism Unit on 24 Feb 19.

Reason: My asshole is not for sale in this team

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I have heard of a colonel in MARSOC say this:

 

"It is not my duty to prepare for wars for cocaine. I prepare for wars of sugar."

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SSgt McCelvy, in the news article planning forum, regarding the current headline crawl:

 

Quote

Sorry if this is an abuse of privileges, but they lying on me. I would never trade a baby for less that 20 Big Macs.

 

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39 minutes ago, Maj Ray said:

SSgt McCelvy, in the news article planning forum, regarding the current headline crawl:

 

 

McCelvy would never find himself in that situation.

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Maj Laprade:yeah the russian bots wer...

Teamspeak voice: (User in your channel timed out)

Anderson: THE RUSSIAN BOTS GOT HIM!

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Sgt Spears *Joins channel*
Sgt Spears: It's wild how difficult coffee is to make. . .
GySgt Specter: Like...At what point? Brewed? Roasted? Picked? Grown?
Sgt Spears: *Rambling, total confusion, no idea what he's talking about*
SSgt Turk *Joins channel*
Capt Kardnal: Turk, how is coffee made?
SSgt Turk: Oh, you grow it on trees, and pick beans and then roast them and then grind the beans and you steep in water so you can drink it in morning so you don't murder your neighbors.
GySgt Specter: That's not even his first language and he's educated me more in five seconds than you have in five minutes.

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[Pre-FTX]

Capt Kardnal: Ares, communications frequency?

CW4 Carrera: [Something that ended in 0]

Capt Kardnal: Was that 7-0 or 1-0?

LTC Brueske: Hahaha, 1-0 doesnt exist, the radio only goes up to 99.

Capt Kardnal: Brueske, that's channel 10, that's A. Co. Coordination net.

LTC Brueske turns and sprints off the side of the aircraft carrier to avoid laughter.

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Sgt Spears: Picking up this Igla. [Also wielding AK]

Sgt Hastings: CONTACT FRONT

Sgt Spears: Wha-

Hastings lights Spears up with a 7-9 round burst.

Hastings, audibly clenching teeth: Oof.. that was friendly.. what am I gonna do..

Capt Kardnal: You should be moving to medically assist him right now..

Hastings, ever the smartass: Yeah but I'm pulling security.

Capt Kardnal: Clearly.

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Myself, Carter, and Kardnal in a building receiving fire.

 

Kardnal: How is it we're taking heavy machine gun fire and I can STILL hear Rivera yelling outside.

 

Rivera, outside: *unintelligible yelling louder than the Dshkm*

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