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NEWS
  • In Universe Dateline: September 30th 2024
  • Mr. Harrea's house crushed by falling debris in Venezuelan Space Program accident
  • S4 server team member slips on carpal tunnel braces with the calm of a soldier prepared to die in battle
  • SUG Rebels gain legitimacy in Venezuela following several successful offensives
  • Skirmishes along Afghanistan-Pakistan border raises concerns about new flare up in the region
  • Malden defense forces intercept massive shipment of weapons and narcotics from Libya
  • Florida dad spends retirement untangling big mess of wires
  • Livonian parliament passes reunification law, US and Polish troops plan staged withdrawal
  • Man claims he was acting under Taylor Swift's secret orders after being arrested at NATO summit
  • THESE HEADLINES ARE WORKS OF FICTION INTENDED TO SUPPORT THE STORYLINES OF THE 3d MRB REALISM UNIT

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Posted

I'm explaining how the Giants are dropping Ereck Flowers (left tackle) for a player from the Patriots:

Me: "Ereck Flowers can eat a dick in every orifice"

Specter: "He's TERRIBLE. I'm a better left tack- like, McCelvy, you're a better left tackle than Ereck Flowers"

McCelvy: "Well yeah I'm the shit..."

  • Haha 5
Posted

@Maj RayTalking about coming back from his LOA

 

"OK I'm out. And also I'm getting Wendy's tonight, because I'm coming down from Mount LOA with the digital tablets in both hands."

  • Like 1
  • Upvote 1

LTC N. BRUESKE
1st Battalion CO | S-2 Chief / Battle Captain / Zeus Operator | S-3 TACP-Q Instructor | S-4 Logistics Team Leader
160th Special Operations Aviation Regiment

MRB Command Staff

 

VXsWj1s.png

Posted

1stLt Kardnal: "That Chinese restaurant is so authentic it got raided for human trafficking."

  • Haha 5
  • Upvote 1

MAJ E. RAY
Retired
MRB Command Staff (R)
 

cWo5zmu.png

Posted

Cpl Wauben: Sgt Carter, I need doc.
Sgt Carter: What happened?
Cpl Wauben: Well when you told me not to sit on the pointy end of my 240. .
Sgt Carter: I didn't tell you, I assumed it was common knowledge. It's a good way to burn out your barrel.

  • Haha 3

CAPT M. KARDNAL
Retired

 

uJHIHJW.png

Posted

We didn't have many people show up for Team training so we postponed and made a little fun mission.

Choice quotes:

 

"Wait, go to Chernarus and go to the big school building."

"No, we can't shoot up a school."

 

"We must protect the our Sunni brothers from the Shiite invaders"

 

"Why did you shoot that Igla at me?"

 

"Fuck optics, I practiced shooting with no sights, like a proper terrorist."

 

 

 

 

  • Like 2
  • Haha 2
Posted

Me: "I'm drinking the healthy version of monster..."

McCelvy: "Fuck that's like me saying smoking Amercian Spirits are the healthy version of smoking cigarettes" 

  • Haha 3

CAPT P. WAUBEN
Retired

 

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Guest
Posted (edited)

Imeson: If I meet my maker tomorrow I'm gonna say "What the fuck bro?!"

Edited by Guest
forgot a "
Posted

Air to ground comms during Siren Song 01-18

Capt Jennings:  WILL CARPET BOMB FOR FREE, DIAL 1-800-JENNINGS-NOW
Oh man you get me a treeline and i'll turn it into a fucking charcoal production line
White phospours comes free

 

 

  • Like 2
  • Haha 2

MSGT R. FALCONER
MSOT 8313 Team Chief | S-2 Zeus Operator / Battle Captain / News Specialist
Alpha Company, 3d MRB, Marine Raider Regiment
 

DLc1McC.png

Posted
1 hour ago, Capt Falconer said:

Air to ground comms during Siren Song 01-18

Capt Jennings:  WILL CARPET BOMB FOR FREE, DIAL 1-800-JENNINGS-NOW
Oh man you get me a treeline and i'll turn it into a fucking charcoal production line
White phospours comes free

 

 

hey cocksucka it was over steam

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1

CW3 W. JENNINGS
Retired


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Posted
10 hours ago, Capt Jennings said:

hey cocksucka it was over steam

Still counts

MSGT R. FALCONER
MSOT 8313 Team Chief | S-2 Zeus Operator / Battle Captain / News Specialist
Alpha Company, 3d MRB, Marine Raider Regiment
 

DLc1McC.png

Posted (edited)

1stLt Kardnal: I'm gonna go take a nap

Charlie Team Lead: Kardnal don't you dare

1stLt Kardnal: *Goes Away*

Charlie Team Lead: KARDNAL!!! You bitch. Se this is why you don't give your bitches privileges

Edited by HM1 (FMF) Williams
  • Haha 5

HMCS J. WILLIAMS
Retired

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Posted (edited)

*searching police vics in OSS 01-18*

 

Seixeiro: "Hey Pulliam, how much cocaine is bad?"

Me: "Uh... yes?"

Seixeiro: "Great answer. Hey Gwynne, grab all of it."

Edited by HM2 (FMF) Pulliam
  • Haha 4

HM1 C. PULLIAM
Retired

 

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Posted
53 minutes ago, Sgt Cooper said:

 

ml4SYR0.jpg

 

Fixed it for you

  • Haha 1
Posted

"My niece was over there beboping like what's his name, Squarepants Bob or some shit, and she's beboping around dancing and throwing the ball down the lane. Meanwhile I'm here using proper form, kicking my legs out, and she's kicking my ass!" McCelvy on Wii bowling

  • Haha 3
Posted (edited)

Brueske playing City Skylines and a natural disaster occurs.

 

Brueske: What happens when tornadoes go over land? Do they turn into waterspouts?

 

 

Edited by HM2 (FMF) Benson
  • Upvote 1

SSGT L. BENSON

Critical Skills Operator

3d MRB, Marine Raider Regiment
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Posted

Cpl Seixeiro: I really wanna buy a lever action because I can't find a practical use for another AR.
SSgt Derr: You could go and find a school.

  • Haha 3
Posted

Hamm: "Hammeo Hammeo wherefore art thou Hammeo"
McAllister: "Thats funny because it comes from the play, Hamlet."
Moraven: "... what? No, it's from Romeo!"
 

  • Haha 3

CAPT W. BAZARNICKI
Retired

 

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Posted (edited)

Cpl Rougth: "What are you? A closet Black?"

Edited by LTC Brueske
  • Haha 2

LTC N. BRUESKE
1st Battalion CO | S-2 Chief / Battle Captain / Zeus Operator | S-3 TACP-Q Instructor | S-4 Logistics Team Leader
160th Special Operations Aviation Regiment

MRB Command Staff

 

VXsWj1s.png

Posted

McBean: "LOA Cole is my Dad"

  • Upvote 1

LTC N. BRUESKE
1st Battalion CO | S-2 Chief / Battle Captain / Zeus Operator | S-3 TACP-Q Instructor | S-4 Logistics Team Leader
160th Special Operations Aviation Regiment

MRB Command Staff

 

VXsWj1s.png

Posted

J Willy, playing Tarkov: "Ray, I'm gonna die!"

Me: "Technically, we're all dyin--"

J Willy: "SHUT UP!"

  • Like 1
  • Haha 3
  • Upvote 1

MAJ E. RAY
Retired
MRB Command Staff (R)
 

cWo5zmu.png

Posted

Cpl Turk: Yeah I'm going to hell. Its probably a nice place.

  • Haha 2

CAPT J. HART
MSOT 8311 Team Leader | S-2 OIC | S-3 ITC Instructor
 | S-4 Logistics Team Leader
Alpha Company, 3d MRB, Marine Raider Regiment
MRB Command Staff

 

yhBpLzI.png

Guest
Posted (edited)

Sgt Moraven: "It feels good to have a nice long tube in my hands"
Sgt Moraven an hour later recounting the moment.

Sgt Moraven: "It feels good to have a long tube in my mou..hands"

Edited by Guest
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