3d MRB Quote Book

[Maj (Ret) Ray]

On 8/3/2018 at 8:16 PM, Maj Ray said:

Tales from CS OPSEC:

 

Maj Makowski: "Now, when I'm on the ground, my callsign is Mako. When I'm in the air, my callsign is Sharknado."

CW4 Whelan, suppressing his laughter: "It's funny but I fucking hate you so much right now!"

 

 

<22:40:10> "Maj Makowski": <22:39:30> You poked "CW4 "Otto" Whelan" with message: did you notice my call sign on CTAB?
<22:39:52> "CW4 "Otto" Whelan" pokes you: YES, YOU SHITBAG CUNT WANKER PIECE OF SHITHOLE TWAT FACE
<22:403> You poked "CW4 "Otto" Whelan" with message: BAHAHAHAHAHAH

Edited September 10, 2018 by Maj Ray

[Capt Hart]

When ya still haven't met the guy who goes to the same school as you....

 

[Capt (Ret) Kardnal]

Cpl Zietara: Oof. Really a surprise he survived. I was caught between two men, and here I am. (reinsert)

[Capt Hague]

Capt. Kardnal  Started a new chat -

<02:41:38> "Capt Kardnal": Let's try to lock it up around debrief next time, solid?
<02:42:51> "Cpl Hague": I assume you refer to the slidey chem light? Capt.
<02:43:03> "Capt Kardnal": Affirmative.
<02:43:17> "Capt Kardnal": I thought it was hilarious, mind, let's just reel it in a bit during debrief.
<02:44:33> "Cpl Hague": Solid. I thought it would help keep the heads faced forward. You know what marines are like, maybe they would think its a crayon
<02:44:44> "Capt Kardnal": Jesus lord.

 

GySgt Carters Started new chat -

 

<02:45:20> "GySgt Carter": 10/10 for crayon joke

[Specter]

@J. Wolfe Opening up a care package from his mom via Snapchat: It's all just Aloe Water.....WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH 20 BOTTLES OF ALOE WATER?!

[Maj (Ret) Ray]

<22:06:14> "Capt Kardnal": im speaking to you now through an SSD

<22:06:29> "Capt Kardnal": i have seen the light of god and i am in his light

<22:06:45> "Capt Kardnal": now i need to buy a second SSD to install arma into
<22:06:51> "Capt Kardnal": and a third for all the mods
<22:07:23> "Maj Ray": Just get a 1 TB SSD, they're like $150 now. Holds everything, including your porn.

<22:07:34> "Capt Kardnal": no theyre still $260
<22:07:42> "Capt Kardnal": I just got a 256 for $150

<22:08:07> "Maj Ray": Dude
<22:08:08> "Maj Ray": https://www.amazon.com/Samsung-Inch-Internal-MZ-76E1T0B-AM/dp/B078DPCY3T/
<22:08:23> "Maj Ray": "Shopping With Ray: FIND ALL THE DEALS"
<22:08:32> "Capt Kardnal": how do i bookmark you

[Maj (Ret) Ray]

<22:12:59> "Capt Kardnal": every time i open a corona someone quotebooks me
<22:13:15> "Maj Ray": Let that be a lesson, don't drink Mexican piss water

[Capt (Ret) Kardnal]

<21:13:22> "Capt Kardnal": do you want to be angry, because i can make you really angry
<21:13:28> "Capt Kardnal": with this little tidbit of knowledge
<21:13:38> "Capt Kardnal": i didnt buy a 3.5" adapter for my new ssd
<21:13:46> "Maj Ray": That's OK.
<21:13:49> "Maj Ray": Scotch tape.
<21:13:53> "Capt Kardnal": so its just sitting looseleaf in the bottom of my pc bumpin around with my power  cables
<21:13:57> "Maj Ray": I used to do that when SSDs were still a thing.
<21:13:59> "Maj Ray": * new thing
<21:14:00> "Capt Kardnal": the tension of my cable management keeps it secure
<21:14:05> "Maj Ray": Approved.
<21:14:06> "Capt Kardnal": lmfao
<21:14:11> "Capt Kardnal": thats so whack
<21:14:15> "Capt Kardnal": now i understand unit servers
<21:14:24> "Maj Ray": Unit servers are professionally built and hosted.
<21:14:29> "Maj Ray": I don't get a chance to duct tape a bitch

S-4 OIC

[Capt (Ret) Kardnal]

Capt Kardnal: Duck, we're going to need your Gustav for this tasking.
SSgt Schwarz: Yea, no problem. I just miss a lot though, but we have the ammo.
Capt Kardnal: O-K, I'm sure Spears would like his chance in the spotlight.
SSgt Schwarz: Wait, no.
(Later)
SSgt Schwarz: Spears, I hereby disallow you from carrying the 249.
Cpl Spears: It's okay, I've already got a Gustav.

[Capt Hague]

Melbert: yeah get the fuck away!

Rivera: No fuck that now I'm going to ride your face~ wait.. no...

Melbert: Hummm... ok I'm going away now.

Hague: At least that will help you finish jerking off, lol

Melbert: Fuck no! I'm not going be able to jerk off for a week now!

[Maj (Ret) Ray]

HMCS (FMF) Parker: "Listen, Mako, I know you went back and edited some of your older posts to show your LtCol rank..."

[Maj (Ret) Ray]

HM3 (FMF) Rivera: "Yo, I want to see this naked man!"

[Cpl (Ret) VandeVord]

@SSgt Anderson: Women are property.

[Cpl (Ret) VandeVord]

LTC Brueske: Women are slaves.

[SSgt (Ret) Melbert]

GySgt Specter drunk at 2am

Specter: I gotta pee!

Rivera: Why don't you just go to a tree and pee?

Specter Cause there's only one tree on this entire ooooo she's hot as fuck 

Me: Can you be this drunk for our op tonight???

Specter: Dave Chapelle joined the unit??

Edited October 28, 2018 by Cpl Melbert

[HMC (Ret) (FMF) Rivera]

HMC (FMF) Williams: God I hate woman.

HMC (FMF) Williams: Thats it, im going gay, Melbert what you doing?

Cpl Melbert: Im always looking to get out the barracks....
HM2 (FMF) Rivera: oh wow a contract marriage!
HMC (FMF) Williams: The dont ask dont tell is still in effect right?
Williams fiance in the background: AHEM

 

[HMC (Ret) (FMF) Rivera]

HM2 (FMF) Rivera: HA! he sent me the proof!
HMC (FMF) Williams: Dammit Melbert i though we had something
Cpl Melbert: Till you get me out the barracks we dont have anything

[Maj (Ret) Ray]

CW4 Whelan: "I'm just upset you think S-5 is going to be an in-game S-Shop."

SSgt Anderson: "It's not my fault you don't believe in the future."

[Specter]

17 hours ago, Cpl Melbert said:

GySgt Specter drunk at 2am

Specter: I gotta pee!

Rivera: Why don't you just go to a tree and pee?

Specter Cause there's only one tree on this entire ooooo she's hot as fuck 

Me: Can you be this drunk for our op tonight???

Specter: Dave Chapelle joined the unit??

I don't remember this.

[MSgt (Ret) Carter]

Girlfriend: Why are you parking over there?!

 

Me: Cuz it’s busy

 

Girlfriend: what the fuck are you talking about?

 

Me: Negative. Wave off!

 

Girlfriend: what the — let me out here

 

Thanks @LTC Brueske

[SSgt (Ret) Melbert]

Me: kakta you're a boot

HM1 (FMF) Kakta: Shut the fuck up PFC 

HM2 (FMF) Rivera: Actually all of you are boots to me, I am a senior Specialist.

LCpl Lombardo: None of you have deployed so you're all boots to me. I deployed to Korea.

HM1 (FMF) Kakta: Fuck you a ship doesn't count! South Korea isn't a deployment.

LCpl Lombardo: Actually it's outside the country

HM2 (FMF) Rivera: THAT'S NOT A DEPLOYMENT! THAT DOESN'T FUCKING COUNT!

HM1 (FMF) Kakta: That's like saying Hawaii is a deployment. 

LCpl Lombardo in TS chat: Asia deployment 2K18

 

[HMCS (Ret) (FMF) Williams]

[Capt (Ret) Kardnal]

Template has been loaded for all of five minutes.
GySgt Carter: Well, Brueske already needs medical attention, so we're off to a great start.

[Capt (Ret) Kardnal]

HMC (FMF) Williams: *hotmike of some NASA documentary*
Cpl Torregrossa: WILLIAMS, THE NUMBERS, WHAT DO THEY MEAN?!

[LTC Brueske]

Cpl Hastings: "I'm far to autistic for REAL Active Duty"