3d MRB Quote Book

[GySgt (Ret) Red]

Sgt Woods: "This might be a tad awkward. Does it look like I've been sweating.....in my crotch region."
Me: "Yes."

Edited March 15, 2017 by SSgt Red

[Guest]

HM2 Benson: I don't want to get emotionally attached to titties. That's why I don't watch Game of Thrones.

[HM1 (Ret) (FMF) Mask]

Me: Hey Ray... Knock Knock.
Ray: Who's there?
Me: Moved.
Ray: ":( COME BACK THIS IS YOUR ONLY FORWARDING ADDRESS"

[Guest]

SSgt Bazarnicki: Moraven is like a reverse ATM, I swipe a credit card through her butt crack and she spits out money.

Sgt Moraven: OH!! That reminds me of a story.

[Capt Hawkins]

HM3 Mask: You know what helps me out when I'm nervous Hawkins?
Me: Whats that?
HM3 Mask: What makes me feel better when I'm nervous is I like to eat a bag of Cheetos® and then have wet dreams while I'm playing
Me: Don't fall asleep on me Mask.

[HM2 (Ret) M. Anderson]

Sgt Moraven: I think there's 24 of them, one for each letter in the alphabet

[Specter]

@SSgt Falconer "I DO want to kill children."

[HM1 (Ret) (FMF) Pulliam]

SSgt Red: "Can you imagine a 40mm GL propelled dildo?"

[Maj (Ret) Ray]

SSgt Falconer: "If you can't control your poop, there's something wrong with you."

[Seixeiro]

Cpl Melo : Hey Harmon, when are we gonna... FUCK ?!?!?!?!?

[Maj (Ret) Ray]

2ndLt Hart: "I forgot that my 'push to talk' button is the 'prime grenade' button."

[Capt Hart]

Cpl Cole: If this map was a woman I would take it to dinner.

[Capt Hart]

Cpl Cole: Do I want to get sweaty before bed?

Later...

Cpl Cole: I found out the other day that I am very capable of murder.

Cpl Cole: Nothing fills me with rage and wanting to kill more than BAKING!

Edited May 6, 2017 by 2ndLt Hart

[Specter]

Sgt Coburn: Aahhh....molestation is the best..

[Capt (Ret) Kardnal]

LCpl Swanson: "That AT gun is very upsetti spaghetti" The very last words of LCpl Swanson.

[Capt (Ret) Kardnal]

Sgt Hawkins: "Alright let's go over there and demo that SAM now that we have control of the runway"
SSgt Falconer: "No. It's not our issue anymore."
LCpl Kardnal: ".. . .C'mon Hawkins lets blow it up!"
LCpl Kardnal and Sgt Hawkins sprint off before SSgt Falconer can get a word in edgewise or notice that they are missing.

200m later. . .

LCpl Kardnal and Sgt Hawkins are approached by an Army Specialist 'Harry Johnson', who tells them "Hey, this runway is under our control now. No need to demo anything." Interrupting Hawkins and Kardnal planting charges.
LCpl Kardnal: "Well I've got higher-ups demanding this SAM be demo'd ASAP."
Harry Johnson: "Can't let you do that."
LCpl Kardnal: "Hold up. Let me contact My superiors." (Radio queues common channel) "Command, this is Kardnal. Army wants us to stop the demo on the SAM. How do you want me to proceed?"
SSgt Falconer: (radio) "Don't blow up the SAM."
LCpl Kardnal: "Yeah they want us to blow up the SAM."
Harry Johnson: "Okay, carry on." (jogs the fuck off)

Operator to the max. "Too Opsec for you"

[Capt Hart]

SSgt Falconer: I just realized that I held down my push to talk while I ate my nuts.

[Maj (Ret) Ray]

LCpl Swanson: "This has to be Canada or some other third world country."

[HM3 (Ret) Felix]

<21:47:11> "Sgt (Ret) Coburn": fresher ingredients, fresher unit.
<21:47:38> "1stLt G. "Penguin" Parker": Fresher Ingredients, Fresher Unit, Papa De Leo's.
<21:47:50> "Sgt (Ret) Coburn": Its not delivery, its DeLeos.

[J. Wolfe]

Sgt Boardman: "Pre juices"

[Swanson]

Sgt Boardman - "I'm a morning after pill."

[Capt Hart]

1stLt Ray: Stick with me kid. You'll go far. Into a ditch. Screaming.

[Capt Hart]

More great out of context ray quotes...

1stLt Ray: It smells like fish pussy

[Specter]

<22:04:56> "HN J. Wolfe (Laptop)": Yeah but once you get 2 dicks in the ass your life will never be the same

[Capt (Ret) Kardnal]

Sgt Boardman: Just smoke a li'l WWWEEEEEEEEEEEeeeed.
Sgt Boardman: That is, coming from the girl who "tried" to smoke it. . Once.. .